Day Fifty-Five

Oh how time flies. I can't believe it's the first day of Spring already! You know what that means, summer is right around the corner! Time to really kick it up a notch, I just need it to be April 15 so my life can get back to normal. It is quite a challenge to work 60 hours a week, prepare healthy dinners every night, keep a clean house, workout 5 days a week, try to squeeze in a shower (or two!), grocery shop, do the laundry, pay bills, and maintain any level of sanity! I'm about to loose it! I'm just completely worn out. One more month, I keep telling myself that. One more month. I have to force myself to go to the gym now. I do feel better after my workout, but all I can think about at the gym is everything else that I should be doing. It's impossible to do everything and having to pick out what I can do is very hard. It's like I can be successful at work and look good, while my housekeeping falls apart and relationships suffer, or I can be a good homemaker but gain 20 pounds and my work suffers. Where's the balance? I am at my breaking point. I don't know how much longer I can keep up like this. A month...feels like forever. And to make matters worse I am an emotional eater, don't know when that started but it's true. When I'm stressed I want food, don't care what kind or how much. And I'm exhausted which means more coffee and soda which means more sugar. I am basically going to the gym right now to maintain my weight which totally sucks. And since my workouts are typically much shorter than they were a month ago not much improvement is happening as far as toning and definition goes. Which makes working out discouraging because nothing is happening. So I get stressed about that, it's a sick cycle.